Rubin's point—with which I agree—is that there is a difference between the shock humor of Lisa Lampanelli and the ideological hatred spewed by Tracy Morgan. Comedians do not always get a free pass just because they're comedians, even if sometimes humor clearly mitigates the content of their speech. But in this case, Morgan wasn't even joking around. Gay is a choice, I'd kill my son if he were gay, etc.? Show me the character he was playing or the punchlines. What he did was much more akin to what Michael Richards and Mel Gibson did—he snapped and said what he truly believes. And that is a lot harder to apologize for than an off-color remark or ethnic joke or even making a gay joke that rubbed LGBT groups the wrong way. (It's even harder when he says during the act he doesn't care if gay people get pissed off, then still apologizes later.)
Morgan had a right to say it, we all have a right to reject it and to make hell for him. Everybody's free speech is working just fine.
Martin's column is especially wrong-headed because he seems to be arguing how if it's wrong to use the word "faggot," it's wrong to use the word "faggot." Same with the N-word:
"So if the HRC says we're to eradicate the F-word from our language, just as the NAACP says we're to get rid of the N-word, then why do we allow the exceptions to the rule, and end up praising the offenders as friends of our communities?"
But just as he is arguing that humor is a mitigating factor (context, context, context), context is everything—a black person using the N-word is not the same as a white person using it. A gay person using the F-word is not the same as a straight person using it. And a friend of the LGBT community using the F-word in an "honorary gay" way is also not the same as a straight person using it out of the blue. Some people may not love even insiders using slurs (the NAACP "buried" the N-word), but it is inarguably a whole different context. Also doesn't mean someone who isn't gay can never use that word; the context would be key to whether it would fly.
I'm not sure why Wanda Sykes or anyone else would be surprised by Martin's stance in defending Tracy Morgan against gay people. (Martin claims to think what Morgan said was "vile," but that stance has evolved as he's been attacked by people who delusionally think he should know better.) Keep in mind his wife's ex-gay therapies. He is anti-gay, and he's not even on the downlow about it—except maybe to himself.