After an auction at which her Rebel Heart Tour dress was auctioned for the princessly sum of $150K and at which she pledged to remarry ex-husband Sean Penn, Madonna performed an hour-long gig in Miami early Saturday that included a cover of “Send in the Clowns,” rarely performed tracks “Like It or Not,” “I'm So Stupid,” “Beautiful Stranger,” “Easy Ride,” and “American Life,” as well as smash hits “Don't Tell Me,” “Express Yourself” and “Holiday.”
But maybe the biggest surprise was a slow-burn take on Britney Spears's “Toxic,” performed in front of anti-Trump projections. She also tried her hand at stand-up comedy and banter, telling jokes that attendees Chris Rock and Dave Chappelle (!) must have found especially painful. The groaner quality of the jokes was part of her shtick, but she should shtick to singing. [Cymbal crash.]
The memorable spectacle raised $7.5 million for Raising Malawi, Madonna's personal charity established to help the African nation from which she adopted two children. $10,000 of that came from a fan who spontaneously offered her the bread in exchange for a kiss. (No tongue.)
Madonna even tried her hand feet at some tapdancing for the first time ever, allowed a lucky fan to hold the mic for her finale, gave one reluctant dude a lap dance, berated the audience and graciously thanked everyone for their help.
Seems like a good time was had by all, and that included Courtney Love (no compacts were thrown), Leonardo DiCaprio, Dave Chappelle, Petra Nemcova, Bethenny Frankel, emcee James Corden and Ariana Grande, who gamely modeled Madonna's Rebel Heart Tour dress and danced with her idol.