(Image via Harper Design)

Picture it: Your living room, late at night, Grindr's buzzing but you're blissfully unaware. Why? Because you just got a book, a book so good they named it.

(GIF via NBC)

If you love The Golden Girls—and let's face it, if you don't, maybe you're on the wrong site?—you will love Golden Girls Forever: An Unauthorized Look Behind the Lanai (Harper Design, $35) by Jim Colucci, and you will absolutely never regret devoting many quiet evenings to committing it to memory.

(GIF via NBC)

Colucci authored the already indispensable The Q Guide to the Golden Girls (Alyson, 2006)—which was specifically targeted at fancy men everywhere—but has taken a more encyclopedic approach this time around, offering 368 pages filled with internal memos; stills; on-set personal candids; interviews with “the show's creators, actors, guest stars, producers, writers, and crew members”; and even a section of tributes from famous fans like Zachary Quinto and Laverne Cox. 

Revisiting one of my top posts ever: #GoldenGirls https://t.co/67mNS3zacV pic.twitter.com/nLzU0wmBJU

— Boy Culture Blog (@mattrett) April 11, 2016

As the expert on the series, Colucci was able to interview Rue McClanahan and Bea Arthur in the years prior to their deaths, and also delivers a new Q&A with Betty White.

(GIF via NBC)

The book's greatest use is its inclusion of exhaustive summaries of every episode, which do a lot more than regurgitate IMDb factoids. Colucci offers original comments from the creatives on the making-of that serve as incredible oral histories, the likes of which few if any other TV series have ever received.

Golden Girls Forever also faithfully documents fan art and fan-appreciation events/plays, making it not just a memento of the series, but a breathlessly faithful chronicle of its impact on the greater culture.

(GIF via NBC)

On a more superficial level, the book is also beautifully designed, as pretty as Blanche's perky bosoms.

Take a lesson, Rose, Golden Girls Forever is how you tell a story.