ABOVE: Summer, hurry up.

BELOW: Keep reading for bareassed ping-pong, Trump pardoning a fellow crook, Cory Booker dating a member of the LGBTQ+ community and more ...

I would lose, playing against him. (Image via screenshot)

COCKTAILS & COCKTALK (WORK UNFRIENDLY): Sometimes, only fully naked ping-pong will do!

SOCIALITE LIFE: Elton John canceled a show halfway through, tearfully. He was diagnosed with walking pneumonia.

MSN: Rosario Dawson posted on social media in 2018 that she was “sending love to my fellow lgbtq+ homies,” but asserts that that didn't count as coming out as LGBTQ+ herself. But she's actually coming out now, even though she apparently hasn't had relationships with women, just with Corey Booker.

2ND STAGE: True Crime Obsessed, the sassy true-crime podcast, will be taking its show on the road — to a one-night stand on Broadway, making it Broadway's first podcast.

Via press release:

True Crime Obsessed, the smash hit podcast recapping true crime documentaries with signature hilarity and sass, announces a historic show at the Hayes Theater, marking the first time in history a podcast has performed live on Broadway. Co-hosts Patrick Hinds and Gillian Pensavalle are bringing their true crime/comedy podcast live to the stage for one memory-making night, recapping the documentary Frank Serpico — the 2017 documentary that features former NYPD officer Frank Serpico telling the story, in his own words, of his one-man crusade for police reform in the early 1970s.

 

Throughout the evening, Hinds and Pensavalle will be joined on stage for live performances from their Broadway pals Justin Guarini, Olivier Award winner Lesli Margherita, and Ellyn Marie Marsh.

TOWLEROAD: Cher endorses Joe Biden.

Muah-donna (Image via Instagram)

INSTAGRAM: Madonna posts thanks to her “loved ones,” including a pic kissing her boyfriend Ahlamalik. On to Paris for the final stop of her Madame X tour/feat of endurance.

And all that Aljaz! (Image by Kenneth Walsh)

KENNETH IN THE (212): I almost — almost — think this dude just watches tennis for the ass.

GR8ERDAYS: Jack Palance was 73 when he did those one-handed push-ups at the Oscars in 1992. Today, he would've been turning 100, a fact that makes me feel about 99:

JOE.MY.GOD.: Trump pardons rich-as-sin ex-NFL owner who did time in gambling scam. Because of course.

INSTAGRAM: Connor Jessup and Miles Heizer make it Instagram official a few days post-V-Day, sharing a photo that definitely shows them moments after sex.

WAPO: Assault-weapons ban fails in Virginia — thanks to turncoat Democrats. Primary these fools:

Four Democrats — Sens. R. Creigh Deeds (Bath), John S. Edwards (Roanoke), Chap Petersen (Fairfax City) and Scott A. Surovell (Fairfax) — sided with Republicans on the Senate Judiciary Committee to reject the assault weapons bill for the year. On a 10-to-5 vote, the committee sent the measure to the state’s Crime Commission for study.

OMG.BLOG! (WORK UNFRIENDLY): Ridiculous, deadpan Walmart photo ops to make you grin go viral:

Mustache love (Image via Charlene)