ABOVE: We are FINALLY getting a peek at Taron Egerton's Cock.

BELOW: Keep reading for a hot calendar, a gay cop settling a discrimination suit (in San Francisco!), Mark MacKillop's Birdland debut, your Oscar hosts and more ...

Calendar cover (Image by James Reed)

OUTSPORTS: The U.S. men's bobsled team pitched in and posed for an almost-naked calendar to fund their Olympic journey, raising $90K in a week by baring their assets. The photographer was apparently one of their own members. I mean. You know what I mean. You can purchase prints here!

Gay cop triumphs with settlement in discrimination suit. (Image via social media)

BAY AREA REPORTER: Gay cop Brendan Mannix got $225K to settle his discrimination case with the city.

BIRDLAND: Mark MacKillop is making his Birdland debut with Duets.

EXTRATV: Your Oscar hosts will be Regina Hall, Amy Schumer and Wanda Sykes!

KENNETH IN THE (212): Norway's curling-team star Magnus Vågberg is calendar-ready himself:

Norwegian wood (Image via  Instagram)

NYT: Sarah Palin's libel case against The New York Times was tossed out by the judge, who declared her team had failed to produce any evidence. Nonetheless, it went to the jury, which would be allowed to continue deliberating. This will never end — right-wingers will keep suing legitimate news sources in order to achieve their goal of inhibiting free speech, or possibly taking it to SCOTUS in order to legally reign in the First Amendment.

NPR: Charming. Cops in San Francisco have allegedly been using rape-kit DNA to link victims to other crimes.

US: Joy Behar will be trolling Meghan McCain until she dies. Then, it'll be up to us to continue trolling that monster.

AOL: About 64% of the NYC workers fired over their failure to comply with a vax mandate were from the Dept. of Education. The United Federation of Teachers sued to block their dismissal and lost. About 1,000 NYC workers were fired for refusing the COVID-19 vaccine, so that means: More jobs for everyone else! Bye. You just got educated.

HUFF POST: Anti-vaxxer Djokovic says he'll skip Wimbledon and the French Open over their vaccine mandates.

Olympic-sized balls (Image via Twitter)

TWITTER: No, Adam Rippon is not joining OnlyFans. His tweet refers to this far more serious situation.

SOCIALITE LIFE: And, to end one of my horniest news round-ups ever, some thirst traps from Bridgerton's Season 2.

This looks like an outtake from Andy Warhol's Blow Job. (Image via video still)