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ABOVE: That, my friend, is a cover.
Bonus shot from here: “Are you sure this is how Keith Haring got started?!”
BELOW: Keep reading for Biden not backtracking on Putin, Will Smith's mom enters the conversation, Madison Cawthorn's questionable orgy comment about to be questioned, how the DOJ is asleep at the wheel and more ...
ABC NEWS: President Biden makes no apologies for “expressing moral outrage” in stating Putin “cannot remain in power.” Good for him.
CBS NEWS: Phone logs turned over to the January 6 Commission reveal a gap of 7 hours, 37 minutes in Trump's calls, a clear — and Nixonian — effort to cover up his treasonous activities. Fire Merrick Garland today and get someone as AG who owns a motherfucking calendar.
POLITICO: Meanwhile, the DOJ hasn't even pursued the contempt citation brought against Trump's former chief of staff Mark Meadows, who pretty clearly committed wrongdoing. (Not to mention voter fraud. His wife, too!)
EXTRATV: Parents just don't understand! (1) Will Smith's mom was shocked he slapped Chris Rock, urged him to go on a vacation. According to her, and this seems to track, this behavior was wildly out of character for him. And (2) Richard Williams, played by Will in King Richard, said his family does “not condone hitting anyone else unless it's in self-defense.”
PAGE SIX: As I would have guessed, Rock was unaware that Jada Pinkett Smith's shaved head has to do with alopecia. (I don't like her, but she looks pretty great like that — it never occurred to me she had alopecia.)
Madison Cawthorn affirms Washington DC is like the movie House of Cards and said people that he’s looked up his whole life who are now in their 60’s or 70’s have invited him to an orgy at their home and others have done cocaine in front of him. pic.twitter.com/iJnWMJ9PIR— PatriotTakes 🇺🇸 (@patriottakes) March 27, 2022
KAREEM ABDUL-JABBAR: The basketball legend contributes a thoughtful piece on the Smith-Rock incident. I just wish Rock would speak and end it. It feels like it's spiraling.
CNN: Rep. Madison Cawthorn (R-North Carolina) claims influential people in D.C. have invited him to orgies and done coke in front of him. This is FINALLY enough for Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy to take umbrage:
The sexual perversion that goes on in Washington ... being kind of a young guy in Washington, where the average of is probably 60 or 70 — [you] look at all these people, a lot of them that I've looked up to through my life, I've always paid attention to politics ... Then all of a sudden you get invited — “We're going to have a sexual get-together at one of our homes, you should come.” ... What did you just ask me to come to? And then you realize they're asking you to come to an orgy ... Some of the people leading on the movement to try and remove addiction in our country, and then you watch them do a key bump of cocaine right in front of you. And it's like, this is wild.
Who wants to explain to Cawthorn why it's not believable he is on anyone's orgy list? P.S. I'm sure he's lying for attention.
QUEERTY: Joe Rogan is, OF COURSE, all in with Don't Say Gay.
TWITTER: “If you passively observe what is going on ... Blood is on your hands, too. If you still have business and trade with Russia and you don't isolate Russia economically, you're bringing bullets and rockets [in].”
Kyiv's Mayor Klitschko was responding to a question about the words of Candace Owens and Tucker Carlson, which have been blasted all over Russian media to help support its war effort against Ukraine.
Kyiv mayor Klitschko asked about Tucker Carlson, Candace Owens and others on the American Right: “You are part of this invasion. Blood is on your hands too.” pic.twitter.com/xCVAzeI1Gv— Ron Filipkowski 🇺🇦 (@RonFilipkowski) March 29, 2022
VARIETY: Troubled actor Ezra Miller arrested for disorderly conduct, harassment in an incident in Hawaii.
OUTSPORTS: “Dale, we know you're gay”: How a MLB ump came out of the closet for good.
YOUTUBE: Lady Gaga looks like someone shit in her Starbucks during this deliciously shady meet-up with Caitlyn Jenner: