ABOVE: Read what he wrote, tho.

BELOW: Keep reading for David Ortega, Luke Evans and (checks notes) Anita Bryant ...

David, a statue (Image via Facebook)

OMG.BLOG!: Oh, my God — oh, wait, that's why he named the blog that. Well, anyway, oh, my God — this David Ortega mega-nude mega-post is a gift. I like different types of men, but if forced to give a type, DAVID ORTEGA covers it well.

Could the text placement be any more confounding!? (Image via Sport Numéro)

KENNETH IN THE (212): Gus Kenworthy is still a thing.

SOCIALITE LIFE: Behold Regé-Jean Page at the premiere of Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves. He is our new Duncan Regehr!

MAYER OFFICIAL: For the boy who wants to dress like Ross Mathews.

TICKETS HERE: The last time I saw a play by Andy Halliday, it turned out like this. So I'm excited for Obsessed, a new play he's co-written with David McDermott and that stars Emé Esquivel and my old friend Andrew Glaszek ... who looks tailor-made for this period piece.

AP NEWS: Gov. Ron DeSantis (R) will expand Don't Say Gay to all grades — meaning 18-year-olds can't discuss anything queer in school. Including history and science figures.

THE RANDY REPORT: Some parents in Florida can't handle even The David's average-sized penis.

POLITICO: Manhattan DA Alvin Bragg, who is widely thought to be on the cusp of indicting Trump for financial crimes, blasted the messy mogul for what he termed an “unlawful” attempt to interfere with the investigation, making use of the House GOP.

NBC NEWS: Telegraphing his desire for a second U.S. civil war, Trump is holding his first major 2024 campaign rally in Waco, Texas. Yes, that Waco. During the 30th anniversary of the violent raid there.

TWITTER: I don't think assuming Luke Evans is into fisting is all that big a conspiracy theory with that tattoo.

HUFF POST: Is Rupert Murdoch finally done with Trump? Part 11,002.

TWITTER: That vile Anita Bryant, whose absurd drive to outlaw gay in the '70s in Florida is — out of nowhere — taking root 40+ years later, is, sadly, alive and turning 83 today. Somewhere. I hope her lesbian granddaughter eats all the cake.

She better citrus her ass down! (Image via eBay)