ABOVE: I'm afraid I know this one by heart.

BELOW: Keep reading for Aaron Taylor-Johnson's reluctant abs, a paper going out of business thanks to a homophobe and more ...

I'd be happy to get in the mud with AT-J. (Cover by Norman Jean Roy for Esquire)

ESQUIRE: Aaron-Taylor Johnson gets down 'n' dirty with Esquire in a shoot and interview meant to promote his film Kraven the Hunter, which is now bumped till 2024. This is the interview in which he controversially says he didn't like his past blockbuster movies. P.S. Twitter thinks this 33-year-old man is somehow under the spell of his 56-year-old wife, Sam Taylor-Johnson, because they met when he was 18. People are obsessed with victim culture, and the histrionics over age-gap relationships shows that off.

I need Aaron Taylor Johnson in ways that are hazardous to the environment pic.twitter.com/f9QNYbcUi8

— 🦚 Jericho 🦚 (@gayhcavill) August 14, 2023

KENNETH IN THE (212): Hot tennis player gets paid to strut his stuff.

NYT: A Republican goon allegedly called a 13-year-old boy a fag during a public meeting. A local paper reported that. He disputed the report and sued. Now, even though he lost the suit (he continues to appeal), he may succeed in putting the paper out of business. I will ask again: WHERE ARE OUR GAY BILLIONAIRES WHO CAN HELP WITH SHIT LIKE THIS? Instead, we get Peter Thiel, who is gay in name only and fights on the opposite side.

He's not getting the Oscar for this one. Book it!(Images via Netflix)

YOUTUBE: I really don't see it when it comes to Bradley Cooper's Leonard Bernstein look for Maestro. I know he really wants that Oscar, but ... he looks bizarre. The makeup looks laughable, and he sounds exactly like he looks, like he's wearing a fake nose:

TWITTER: “Do I intend the try the 19 defendants in this indictment together? Yes.” Asked and answered.

Fani Willis says she plans to try all 19 defendants at the same time: pic.twitter.com/wouiB8hnhS

— philip lewis (@Phil_Lewis_) August 15, 2023

TWITTER: Will came to support Jack's show!

My dear friend, Eric McCormack, came to “Good Night, Oscar” this past weekend. It’s so wild we both have Broadway shows just a block or so away from each other. 😱 I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again - go see Eric in “The Cottage”. It was SO good and he is masterfully… pic.twitter.com/J6Sb2GWcBj

— Sean Hayes (@SeanHayes) August 14, 2023