ABOVE: Yule log.

BONUS BIRTHDAYS:

BELOW: Keep reading for Jake Gyllenhaal's titties, details on the closing of Berlin and more ...

Jake showed off to Jimmy. (Image via video still)

WORLD OF REEL: Jake Gyllenhaal got buff for Road House ... and now it might go straight to streaming. He's PIZZED.

KENNETH IN THE (212): Kenneth Walsh finally got married — and finally wrote all about it! Congrats to him and his blog-shy husband. This is like when Carol Channing got married past 80! xoxo

PEOPLE: This bitch.

NYT: I'm sad to just now realize that the closing of the Chicago bar Berlin happened because of a labor dispute and the owners' genuine inability to meet the strikers' demands. It's usually clear who is in the wrong when it comes to demanding more rights and money for low-paid workers, but in this case, it really seems like both sides had valid issues. It's a shame a historic site paid the price.

OUT: Billie Eilish came out as queer and promptly lost 100K followers. In 2023. Late 2023.

“You're not crazy — you're mean!” (Image via video still)

BAY AREA REPORTER: Queer holiday viewing ... and don't continue to sleep on 2012's Scrooge and Marley with David Pevsner and Tim Kazurinsky!

EXTRATV: Then there's Ladies of the '80s: A Divas Christmas.

HUFF POST: Right-wing loon James Comer (R-Kentucky) claims Walmart-goers over Thanksgiving were upset about Biden's corruption, and THAT is why the long-stalled GOP impeachment inquiry has finally picked up steam. What a colossal lie and waste of time.

JOE.MY.GOD.: Trevian Kutti, Kanye's former flak who became embroiled in the Trump election-denial scheme, seemed to threaten a witness in her own trial, all but guaranteeing a major clapback from the court. This woman is fucking stupid, as well as evil.

INSTAGRAM: This will annoy as many as it charms:

BILLBOARD: Just in time for her December 11 79th birthday, Brenda Lee has hit no. 1 with “Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree.” It's the song's first trip to pole position and Brenda's third. It's also only the third holiday song ever to hit no. 1. Can you guess the other one? (Because you fuckin' know what one of them is!)

FACEBOOK: Yep. Pull that plug!