ABOVE: A low-down and dirty Zane.

BELOW: Keep reading for Nicholas Galitzine, Nikki Haley, Dean Phillips, the Indigo Girls and more ...

The book's cover image is by Deborah Feingold, from the same session that graces the rare 1984 The Quiet Storm Thai magazine. (Image via Little, Brown)

Reading is ... hard. It takes a lot for me, English degree be damned, to sit quietly and read a book. For years, having my constantly active and attention-craving dogs, and then dog, was enough to keep me judging books by their covers alone. Then, I became as addicted to inst-ernet gratification as a person a couple of generational alphabet letters down the line from me.

At some point, I joked that I don't read at all anymore, and I may have even said so to Mary Gabriel, the acclaimed writer who has set her sights on Madonna with her new biography Madonna: A Rebel Life (Little, Brown, October 2023), because she teased me when she sent me a signed copy of her work — “I know you don't read Madonna books. But read this one. You might learn something.”

!!!

I did and I did. The book is not filled with shockers for diehard fans/addicts, though I'm sure there are things you didn't know or forgot you know, but it is something that has been missing from the hundred or more Madonna books out there so far — a serious, sober, all-inclusive, biographical look at Madonna's life and career executed with scrupulous attention to contextualizing who she is and why that worked and works for us.

There have been a couple of interesting biographies, but I always felt they were lost in the long shadow of Christopher Andersen's dreadful best seller from 30 years ago. It was time for Madonna: A Rebel Life.

And it was time for me to quiz Ms. Gabriel about her gigantic endeavor ...

(Image via video still)

If you're frantically into Harrison Ford, the eternally handsome star is turning 81 (!) today, and I've got a gallery HERE.

Dial this destiny! (GIF via GIPHY)

Happy birthday suit! (GIF via GIPHY)

ABOVE: It's Billy Campbell's 64th! More here.

BELOW: Australian dancer, Ryan Murphy self-IDS as a strike-breaking turd, hot model, France Joli's big break and more ...

ABOVE: My kink is Hugh O'Brian.

BELOW: Keep reading for random shootings, gay history, aged beef and more ...

ABOVE: Russell Todd, one of the hottest men of the '80s, is now one of the hottest men in his 60s.

BELOW: Keep reading for Paul Mescal opening, Michael Imperioli for trans rights, NYC Pride announces theme and more ...

ABOVE: These were Farentino's hottest poses, and it's not even close.

BELOW: An Oscar nominee's hairy pits (no, not Blanchett), a naked French star, OnlyFans models get real, thrill killer of gay men gets sentenced and more ...

@brauhala Backstage with #ArianaDebose, getting ready to do the thing at the BAFTAs. 🥳 #bafta #baftas #angelabassett ♬ original sound - Benjamin Rauhala

ABOVE: Ariana DeBose is, cat-like, saying: “I meant to do that!” re her campy BAFTAs opening. (Still bizarre she deleted socials. It wasn't that deep! It was bad, but in a fun way. Sounded like this.)

BELOW: Orlando Bloom's tits 'n' pits, vintage jockstrap fun, justice for Scott Johnson and more ...