I have felt sickened by what happened to Zafar and Guillermo, and I didn’t have the pleasure and honor of personally knowing them. But I have been through enough that I can have a sense of what you have been - and are - going through. Thank you for sharing all of this. As I have a hunch you already know, the only way to get through the rough stuff is to face it head on (and to be gentle with yourself when you just can’t). Life is rich and full, but sometimes it can be senseless and heartbreaking. Hopefully we all get far more of the former than the latter. For myself, some of the trauma I carry might never go away, but none of the people I mourn would want me to live in it. They would have wanted me to have the full life that they were deprived of.
Matthew, of course you use your writing skills to create a loving, vivid, and heartfelt-but-real portrait of your friend. What a devastating loss; what a fantastic tribute. All my best wishes to you.
I'm sorry for your loss, Matthew. I lost a number of people over the last year, none violently, but one just as personal, sudden and devastating. You express very well the disbelief, the difficulty squaring it with reality. One aspect, is the number of things you shared only with that person, things no one else will ever know. It feels surreal. Your line, "It feels like something foundational in my life was ripped away for no reason." hit me. Your tribute is wonderfully written.
A beautiful tribute.
I have felt sickened by what happened to Zafar and Guillermo, and I didn’t have the pleasure and honor of personally knowing them. But I have been through enough that I can have a sense of what you have been - and are - going through. Thank you for sharing all of this. As I have a hunch you already know, the only way to get through the rough stuff is to face it head on (and to be gentle with yourself when you just can’t). Life is rich and full, but sometimes it can be senseless and heartbreaking. Hopefully we all get far more of the former than the latter. For myself, some of the trauma I carry might never go away, but none of the people I mourn would want me to live in it. They would have wanted me to have the full life that they were deprived of.
Anyway, much love to you Matthew!
Thank you, Mark, for this thoughtful comment. I really appreciate this.
I appreciate that.
Matthew, of course you use your writing skills to create a loving, vivid, and heartfelt-but-real portrait of your friend. What a devastating loss; what a fantastic tribute. All my best wishes to you.
This is a beautiful remembrance Matt. I'm so sorry for the loss of your friends , this is as sickening as it is sad. Sending you hugs.
I'm sorry for your loss, Matthew. I lost a number of people over the last year, none violently, but one just as personal, sudden and devastating. You express very well the disbelief, the difficulty squaring it with reality. One aspect, is the number of things you shared only with that person, things no one else will ever know. It feels surreal. Your line, "It feels like something foundational in my life was ripped away for no reason." hit me. Your tribute is wonderfully written.